100 Random Things For Which I Am Thankful

  1. Velcro (really....first thing that came to mind)

  2. Razor sharp wit

  3. Protein bars

  4. Friends with low expectations

  5. Health care (regardless of its problems, a system that heals people)

  6. New running shoes (they still jump higher and run faster)

  7. Deep tissue massages (Yea Diana!)

  8. Solar lights

  9. Free stuff

 10. Cushioned chaise lounges

 11. 75 degree weather

 12. Policemen, firemen, paramedics, and servicemen (especially those who happen to be women!)

 13. Books.  All books.  Even those I don't like.

 14. Well designed bras

 15. My Pampered Chef stone cleaner (the tiny plastic wonder)

 16. Dean Smith

 17. A well placed cross

 18. Clever lyrics

 19. Things given in secret

 20. Dove's real woman advertising campaign

 21. Kindness

 22. Trouble - the game, not the thing some of us get into too often

 23. Tinted moisturizer

 24. Trader Joe's white bean hummus with Woven Wheat Wafers

 25. Fireworks, especially Klinger style

 26. Anne of Green Gables - yes, the old PBS one

 27. People who use their talents to help others

 28. Smoothies (a day's worth of fruits and vegetables in a couple of glasses)

 29. Firebirds chocolate cake with salted caramel sauce

 30. Politicians who are public servants
 31. Big, plush bath towels and little thin washcloths.
 32. My garage
 33. Responsible pet owners
 34. Giggle time
 35. People who can keep a secret
 36. Stretch denim
 37. People who give judiciously
 38. Common sense
 39. Attentive drivers

 40. Brilliance

 41. Anything Nerf

 42. 75% off

 43. Merchants whose stores are open when I can shop

 44. Repeated characters in books

 45. Maple trees in fall

 47. Jacuzzi tubs

 48. Good advice

 49. People who live their life out loud

 50. Family

 51. God laughing

 52. Do gooders

 53. Silence

 54. New hot air balloon pilots

 55. People who need people

 56. Pictures that remind me of the past

 57. Long term friendships 

 58. Clean sheets

 59. An empty dishwasher

 60. A big, diverse world

 61. Caregivers

 62. Freedom

 63. Humble churches

 64. A good Facebook status

 65. Happy endings

 66. People willing to lead

 67. Discovering my mind in a liar

 68. Hammocks

 69. 24 hour grocery stores

 70. Songs that make me smile

 71. Waterfalls

 72. Good beating evil

 73. A good customer service person (not a complete oxymoron)

 74. Passion in action 

 75. Tough love

 76. Zip lines

 77. Christmas lights

 78. Dr. Seuss

 79. Sorrento's

 80. Downtown Statesville

 81. Delayed gratification gratified 

 82. Hard work rewarded

 83. Organ donors, blood/platelet donors, and donors to medical research

 84. Surprising myself

 85. New life

 86. Sunscreen

 87. Post it notes

 88. Miracles

 80. Saved concert seats in heaven

 81. Love as a verb

 82. Opinions, matching mine or not

 83. A well-placed rainbow

 84. A body healthy enough to work out

 85. Dolphin sightings

 86. Watching kids grow up

 87. Vibrant sunsets

 88. A paycheck

 89. Silly souvenirs

 90. Balloons passed from friend to friend

 91. A good date

 92. Amazon.com

 93. Sharp knives

 94. Hugs

 95. Snuggling under a blanket

 96. Friends who cook for me

 97. Kayaks

 98. Rocking chairs

 99. Velvet scarves

100. Each moment of living

Don't Assume

From time to time I get frustrated by statements that people make...statements that indicate they think everyone is like them, should be like them, shares their opinions, or fits in a little box of expectations.

One thing you can count on...in almost every group of people there is someone who belies definition, or doesn't look at a specific issue the same way you do.  We think we know others, even those we have never met or engaged in much conversation.  We think those who disagree with us should be punished and subtlety look for ways to do it. 
Here is a list of assumptions I have experienced and have heard that I think poison our world. Assumptions that are not necessarily truth.  These assumptions have limited lives, made people less than they are, have kept people from their potential, and have been used to cultivate lies in brains.  They bring division and not unity.  They are the roots of a lot of evil, directed at ourselves and others.  Here are some thoughts, many learned the hard way.

Don't assume that:

everyone wants to do the right thing.

the idea of who you think you are, is really all that you are.

because you believe something for a long time, it is right.

investing in negative things will produce positive results.

the majority should always rule.

how something looks is how something is.

because people follow you, doesn't mean you are correct or a worthy leader.

because you have experienced the same thing as someone else, you know what they are going through.

what you hear on the news is always truth, or what you would have found significant had you been there.

you have to agree with those you love.

you know your own limits.

everything that is true, is right.

everyone who attends church, or belongs to a church, is a person of faith.

everyone who does not attend church is not a person of faith.

people who look you in the eye are telling you the truth.

you are limited by your age.

it is easy for everyone to attend a party.

you really understand what others think of you.

because someone laughs at your teasing, it doesn't hurt them.

more money solves money problems.

you cannot be an athlete.

because you follow or do what you are told, doesn't mean you haven't made a decision.

all good people share the same faith.

people who have children, or teach children, like children.

those who flatter you, like you.

people's reactions have anything to do with you.

schools breed learners.

people who do not have children, do not have children by choice.....or those who do have children want them.

everything that is legal, is moral, or everything illegal, immoral.

those who don't want children don't like children....or would be bad parents if they chose to have them.

retirement means you never work again.

your doctor can read your mind.

all single people have made the choice to be single, or all singles want to be married.

all married people would marry their spouse again if given a choice.

everyone thinks that the United States is the best country on earth.

someone's sexuality can be determined by the way they talk, or by the way they look.

a marriage or family that looks good on the outside, is really good on the inside.

a marriage or family that looks bad on the outside is really bad on the inside.

everyone sees all the colors that you do.

all people of a particular race were raised the same, or hold the same values.

people who compliment you are telling the truth.

people who tell you that you look younger than your age really mean it, or those who guess your age are guessing the age they think really you are.

everyone is a team player.

those who say they will keep a secret will keep your confidence.

people who look happy, are really happy.

people who look mean are really mean.

anyone can ever stop prayer in schools.

Sunday is the Sabbath for all.

holding a job means you work.

just because it is in print, it is true and accurate.

everyone looks forward to holidays or wants to spend holidays with their family.

all who work on holidays are unhappy about it.

God says the same thing to each person, or expects everyone to believe or do the same things.

those who are in prison are guilty.

those who are declared innocent, are innocent.

freedoms should always be exercised.

quiet people are shy.

the advice of all parents is in the best interest of their child.

those who live in big houses are rich.

those who are homeless are poor.

where there is smoke there is fire.

cleanliness is really next to godliness.

everyone likes to receive gifts.

all pastors are Christians or have a closer relationship with God than you do.

those who profess to be atheists don't hear the voice of God.

those who have pets love animals.

those who don't have pets don't love animals.

all lawyers are sleazy.

some lawyers aren't sleazy.

all doctors have compassion and common sense.

everyone good at their job, likes their job.

they who cry loudest feel more.

you know the heart of someone you have never met, or even those you have.

those who appear healthy really are.

those who say they are sick are really sick.

age brings wisdom.

all members of a family are alike and live life the same way.

you can't do something because you have never been able to do it before.

the fat lack willpower.

the thin are healthy.

bullying is limited to the playground.

your vote doesn't count.

your vote counts.

treatment is available for addicts, even if they want it.

the words of an addict is truth, or that because they love you they won't lie to you.

birthdays are significant to all people, or a celebration for all people.

today is the way it is always going to be.

the strong can't be weak and the weak can't be strong.

everyone has someone with whom to celebrate a holiday, birthday, or special event.

those who appear in control feel that way beneath their skin.

if someone tells you it doesn't matter, it really doesn't.

those who borrow money will ever pay you back.

your sacrifices will ever be appreciated.

our political or justice system will work fine without your attention.

because someone does not speak your language or is from a different culture, they don't understand what you are going through.

celebrities are their image.

everyone sick has someone to hold their hand.

feelings tell you the truth.

people can read your mind.  Even those who love you.

you can read the mind of those that you know and/or love.

the movie is like the book.

you really are good at forming first impressions.

that God views you in the same way that people view you.

you have better things to do than sit on a jury.

people will tell you what they really think.

someone else's opinion of you is correct, whoever they might be.

someone else's opinion of you is wrong, even if it is different than you have always been told.

because you sing and people applaud, you are good at it.

the highly educated are smart, or those with no education are dumb.

there is much value in having cake if you can't eat it.

people owe you their secrets.

you have the moral right to speculate on the private lives of others.

it is true, unless they have told you it is true.

everyone has been the guest of honor at a party.

it is true because they told you it was.

you are too old or too young to help someone else.

that the biggest winner is the one who takes home the trophy or has the highest score.

how old you are has anything to do with your age.

hurting someone who has hurt you, damages them more than you.

attending the same event produces the same experience.

childish behavior is limited to children.

the weather report is accurate.

life is fair.

"I love you" means the same thing to everyone.

you have done anything that God was not aware of or cannot forgive.

how you live your life doesn't matter.

you are the center of the universe.

you are not important.

Assume little.  New opportunities and a bigger world of possibilities open to you when the door to your mind has not been shut.  Remove the deadbolt.  Don't be part of the lynch mob. Think before you speak.  Look at the finish line before you join the race.  Forgive and forget. Notice you don't exist in a bubble.  And sometimes admit you are wrong.

The Disney Princess Life

For as long as I can remember, I have been a reader.  I think one of the side effects is that I often see the world through the eyes of fiction.  It's not really a bad place to be....in fact, I feel sorry for those of you who don't spend a lot of time in the world of your imagination.

Now, I don't shirk from reality...I believe in meeting it head on.  But I don't want to spend all of my time there.  I have found it is quite easy to combine the two.

My friend Debbie and I have a lot in common. We love hiking, kayaking, ballooning, and volunteering, for starters.  At some point in our friendship we started talking about Disney Princess moments. You know the kind.....butterflies floating around your head, birds seemingly singing their songs to you, squirrels stopping dead in their tracks like they know you.  When she heard me speak of this, Debbie is one of the few people who just "got it". She didn't didn't roll her eyes at me or think I was totally wacky.  We'd be out hiking, and butterflies would be everywhere and we would know....it was just for us.  We'd breathe deep and enjoy the special time.  An appreciated moment.  A time of gratitude.  I get calls from Debbie on occasion saying "I just had the best Disney Princess moment...."  A sure way to make me smile because I know she is noticing and loving life.

Debbie got married today, to her Prince Charming Tommy.  The weekend of their proposal was several months ago.  They were in the mountains and well, everything didn't quite go Disney perfectly.  But Debbie said yes, in spite of the missing Disney factor. The next day they were out and about in the mountains...oh, I forget the story exactly.  Lots had gone wrong along the way, and for some it could have been a "crash and burn" weekend.  But then it happened. The scenery was perfect.  Relaxation and peace surrounded them.  Nature was at their beckoning and the Disney Princess had her moment where she could almost hear the soundtrack playing in the background.  It had just happened on a bit of a delay.  But it was confirmation that the engagement was right and marriage was going to be wonderful.

Today at their wedding the Disney Princesses had nothing on Debbie.  Debbie was one of the most beautiful brides I have ever seen.  She and Tommy both radiated joy.  The trees were that gorgeous end of fall color, the sun was shining, the air was invigorating, the water in Lake Norman actually looked blue!  At one point afterward we were talking about how we were a bit confused that the butterflies hadn't swarmed the ceremony.  I guess they figured there was enough beauty there, and they were needed to brighten the world elsewhere.  We Disney Princesses understand and support that sort of thing.

The other week I went to have lunch with my friend Mandy, and her amazing 3-year old triplets. Mandy is quite the Disney Princess herself.  She was at a point where getting pregnant looked like it wasn't in the cards, and at about the last moment of hope she finds out she is pregnant with Babies A, B and C (also known as Maty, Isla, and Chapel).  Now she's pregnant with their brother....another magical surprise.  Fitting for a Disney Princess.

The triplets are going through their own Disney Princess phase and when I was there we dressed them in princess outfit after outfit. They'd try one on, live in it a minute, and try out another one. I loved it.  I am glad that they are living in a world where they can be any princess they want to be. Some people may scoff at the whole idea of raising your girls in Disney Princess world.....thinking women should not base their lives on a story where the woman's life only has value when she is saved by a man.  I have never seen those stories that way...I see women who are not just beautiful, but strong and kind and smart.  They could rescue themselves from any situation they needed to.  The prince saves them, but they save the prince's world, too.  They make a good team.


I wish Mandy's girls, and all women, would continue to see themselves as a bit of a princess.  I wish they would see all of God's creation dancing in their wake.  I wish they would be brave, and resourceful, and smart, and kind....a bit naive, but street wise enough that they notice the wicked witch or the ogres hanging about.  I wish they would not wait on their Prince Charming to start their happily ever after, but take responsibility for making it happen for themselves.

And if Prince Charming does come around, I hope they test him a bit...and make sure he is authentic.  He should be the kind of Prince that would travel far and wide just to return their shoe.  He's no Prince Charming if he is not kind to his princess and if he is not her biggest defender.  He's not a Prince if he doesn't see and respect the princess in  front of him. But if he is the real deal, I hope she grabs him up and appreciates who he is, too.  I hope she doesn't just let him adore her, but that she also adores, protects and defends him. And together I hope they realize happily ever after is made in the choice of how you live every moment and requires a bit of work.


I love how Tommy looks at my friend Debbie.  I know he sees the woman she is and appreciates it.  It's a special kind of joy to see your friend receive that gift.  But Debbie was a princess before she ever met Tommy.  She endured a lifetime of living, a few big obstacles in her path along the way, and came out strong.  The butterflies swarmed her path, the birds sang, the squirrels noticed their friend....because God's creation is in harmony with those who live their lives well.  She is the daughter of a king, a princess worthy of the title.

It's been a fun day, a time when reality and the storybooks are in one accord.  I wish for you, for all of us, a happily ever after.  The kind that requires we open our eyes and notice what a wonderful world this is and how blessed we are with the lives we have.  Where our fairy godmothers (who may look nothing like the ones we have seen in movies) come out of the woodwork to help us, and our kindness and goodness changes the course of lives...both own and the lives of others.  Sometimes you are the Disney Princess, sometimes you are the Prince, and sometimes you're the Fairy Godmother. Regardless, "impossible" is not a word we have to take seriously. Because we're read the books.  Anything can happen.  And the ending is going to be really great!

Lessons Learned From Facebook Games

So OK....the rebel who usually won't do anything that anyone else tells her to do, who is not a crowd follower or someone who gives in to peer pressure over her own judgment, has participated in a few Facebook games recently.  I apologize if I got you to participate unwittingly.  I promise I don't do another soon (warning to those who will try to make me!)

First there was the giraffe one.  Actually I had heard that riddle before and still firmly believe that "the door" is the answer and will still obstinately give that answer if asked the "riddle"....though the truth is that if my parents show up on my doorstep at 3 a.m. for breakfast, the door opening would be their car door as they either picked another sibling to visit or drove themselves to IHoP! Chances are I would sleep through the doorbell.  But if not, I would call the sibs and we'd probably commit them both to a very nice Alzheimer's unit somewhere and let them get their breakfast there. (I'd tell them that it was my place, but I had just re-decorated and invited a few friends over.)

I had a giraffe picture I had taken in South Africa that I loved, so very willingly posted it, and yeah... I kept the game going for the rest of you.  Some posted some awesome giraffe pictures....some ignored it.  Either handling was appreciated by me.

But my precious friend Lisa hated having to put her giraffe picture up, and argued about it quite a bit.  Lisa is a rules girl (in some things) so she did it...but hated it (very logically arguing it said right in the paragraph "you awakened", so opening the door would actually be first.)  I told her, as my former roomie Nancy told me, to suck it up, play the game like everyone else, and be a giraffe. (I don't think I told her "Or not" as I would tell others.  Lisa clearly needed to put that giraffe picture on her wall!)

So when this next game came around, Lisa waited all day for me to comment so she could force me into action.  (She knew chances were good....I always comment.)  I love Lisa, so felt like I had to continue play and do my penance.  My biggest complaint was posting something with bad grammar and sentence structure (not that I worry too much about my own errors!), but still I felt like that was a funny part of this particular game so I did it.  (I will proudly note that some participating friends cleaned up the errors before they posted.)

I carefully made my choices among those given.  Lisa chose the one about being invited to be a prostitute, so that one was out.  Another friend had used the 42 relationships.  I started to use the one about my mom setting me up on a blind date (at least I think that was what they meant!), but figured (wisely, I know!) that my mom would get calls for details of the fix-up and that she would retaliate by actually doing it.  We all know that would not turn out well!  I thought about using the one about being in love with my ex, but knew that would generate lots of comments about my lack of love life over the years...and don't I get enough of that already?  (Most certainly!)  So I thought the "I like someone, what should I do?" one was benign enough....and I thought that everyone knew I already had the answer to that ("Run in fear in the other direction!"  What?  That's not right?).   I thought I was safe.

I was overwhelmed with the responses (some which appeared on Facebook, others that private messaged me or texted), but also so touched.  I do have the most caring group of family and friends...and a few others that love the opportunity to make fun of me as often as possible (my college roommate Ann's response was "Oh....I thought you were hacked"...though I could also tell the other possibly was that I was having a mental breakdown.  But regardless, she did message me!)  It did show me that in the interest of living up to my promise of living out loud, I need to do another blog about my romantic life.  Stay tuned for that soon.  (Yea!  My favorite subject!  Or not.)

If you were one of the "participants" of these games, I think there is much for which you can be proud.  You stuck your neck out ( :) ) to give an answer, even if you could be wrong. Yeah, I know you some of you knew (thought) you were right, but that is beside the point.  To contribute to any dialogue, even a silly one such as this one, you put yourself out there a bit. How better our world would be if more would try to solve the riddles?  Especially smart people like you!

You also were willing to give a friend advice, encourage her, and be happy for her.  That shouldn't be a rare thing, but it is.  I obviously am surrounded by people who do that. What a great fortune to have people who will stand with me in the bad times and rejoice with me in the good.  People who are willing to invest in me and advise me.  What a tribute to your life that you are that kind of person.

I guess when it gets down to it, we can add a new beatitude.  "Blessed are those who participate in life, for they will experience what it is to live."  We can learn from all experiences, even silly Facebook games.  For me, they are just another reminder that life is good...as are the people I am blessed to know.  Like I said, I probably won't be playing another any time soon!  But my giraffe picture....pretty cool, huh?!

Thankful For the Wrong Things

It is early in the month of November and I am already enjoying the Facebook posts of a few friends who are posting what they are thankful for each day of the month.  As I was pondering the thoughts of some, it got me thinking about being thankful....and a related topic....people who are thankful for the very things that destroy them.

Yeah....trust me to find the dark cloud, but it is a frustration sometimes when you see people do this little exercise.  They'll say they are thankful for their family, but I see them treat their family in a way that is worse than they would treat a stranger.  They demean, or disrespect, or just don't notice they are there.  They aren't really finding joy in them.  Is that really thankful?

They will say they are thankful for a friend in their life that you know is not good for them.... someone who brings them down and does not build them up.  Someone who is making their path in life harder instead of easier.  Someone pulling them into the direction of pain and destruction instead of things that will make them happy and fulfilled.  Someone that is encouraging them towards misplaced passions instead of stoking the positive passions that will inflame their lives with good things.

They are thankful for possessions that pull them out of the real world and away from really interacting with people.  The big screen tv, the computer, the cell phone....they can all be amazing tools and life enhancers, or tools of destruction and, well, rudeness and disrespect of others.

They say they are thankful for jobs, education or "stuff", but these things make them think they are better people than those who have not had the same privileges.  They are thankful for pay checks, but when they get them they find they are already spent and simply pay off debts incurred because they are trying to live above their means...a lie, really....and debts continue to incur because they refuse to live a lifestyle they can actually afford.

They are thankful for good health, but don't do the work to maintain that good health.  They are sedentary, eat stuff that is like putting water in their gas tank, they smoke, they over-medicate on drugs they don't need, or obliterate their days with alcohol.  They are abusers of themselves.

They say they are thankful for God, but they haven't had a direct or truthful conversation with Him for a long time, or sat down quietly to simply listen to what He is telling them.  They pray for others, but not for themselves... either because they refuse to love themselves and see the image of God when they look in the mirror, or because they esteem themselves too much and think they can handle everything on their own.

They are thankful for the activities they are involved in, but are over-committed, under-committed, and/or doing things that don't match the priorities of their life.  Doing great things, but the wrong things....avoiding what they actually should be doing. Or they are living their lives aimlessly and wasting their days and investing all of their time in doing stupid things...but yet they say they are thankful for life.

I see myself here.  We need to periodically be at a place where we thoughtfully take an inventory.  I need to take stock and look around me and see that I am living a balanced and meaningful life.  A place where I appreciate the world around me.  A place where I am appreciated and respected and loved.  A place where I don't settle for mediocrity or the ho-hum.

A thankfulness exercise is a great place to start, but being thankful has to be more than words that sound good and pious and spiritual and are simply what we think people want to hear.  Am I thankful for the right things and does my life reflect that?  Am I living the life designed for me?  If not, what do I do to change that?  There is no better time than now to decide....and to be thankful for yet another day that gives us the opportunity to do that!